How do you find happiness in the midst of chaos? We know that happiness comes from inside… but it is so hard to not allow other people around you to affect your happiness. Especially if they are very negative people with bad energy or if they treat you poorly and make you feel awful about yourself. It’s hard to not believe something if someone is constantly repeating it to you.Your environment plays a big role in your happiness and mindset.
The way you speak to yourself is SO vital in combating any negativity that has entered your mind. Speak positively to yourself all the time! When you find yourself thinking ugly thoughts about yourself immediately distract that thought with something else. That is not really YOU talking so you have full permission to shut that voice up. It’s taking valuable head space away from you. So make sure you are “washing” those negative thoughts away with positive thoughts and change the narrative.
I heard this analogy before and I love it so if you’re a visual person like myself you may find it useful. Think of your brain like a cup of clear water. When dirty water (negative thoughts) gets inside it starts to cloud the clean cup of water. So in order to get that water clean again, you have to pour clean water (positive thoughts & self talk, inspiration etc) into the cup as many times as you need to to flush that dirty water out. Same with your brain. You watch a few upsetting videos on social media, now you feel a bit down. Ever notice that? Sometimes you can even feel it in your body! That’s when it’s your job to step in and fill your mind with other things that will make you feel happy, strong, ambitious, etc.
When you make a mistake, be more understanding!! Instead of calling yourself “stupid for not doing xyz” or “so selfish and careless for forgetting that thing.” Try spinning it around. Instead say, “it stinks I forgot xyz but no worries next time I will find a way to remind myself better.”
Just like when you are trying to change something about yourself, like I mentioned in previous blog posts, it’s a mindset game – you repeat it to yourself until you believe it for yourself. This goes for both positive and negative things. If you are constantly saying, “I’m broke”… guess who will most likely stay that way? Same goes for if someone is constantly telling you how “worthless” you are- even if you don’t want to admit it or maybe you don’t even realize, but that sits in your subconscious mind and it will manifest.
Talking down to yourself after a mistake doesn’t correct the mistake and it most likely won’t prevent another one. You have to forgive yourself! There might be a reason you’ve been so forgetful lately (lack of sleep, stress, etc.) or a reason why you have no energy to get all the things done (no self-care, burning out, overwhelm etc.). It’s important to pay attention to your body and the signs your body tries to give you.
Be more mindful next time you are on social media, chatting with a friend or relative that likes to gossip, etc and think about how you feel afterwards. Do you feel some joy? Energized in some way? Sad and unmotivated? Are the negative thoughts you had during that time still in your mind for a few hours after or maybe the rest of the day? Once you realize what you feed your mind has control over how you feel and your mood then YOU have the power.
You are in control of the company you keep. You are in control of the shows and videos you watch. You are in control of what music you listen to. All of these influences are outside, but are still in your control- so be very mindful of this. Create a life you desire, whether that’s full of positivity, surrounded by great people, etc. Take the actions to start manifesting it. If you want to be surrounded by kind people, put yourself in positions to meet these kinds of people. Join a book club, go golfing, go to museums, find a church that vibes with you etc. If you want more positivity in your life then cater to that. Tweak your social media timelines and accounts you follow to show things that bring you happiness, joy and laughter, write affirmations and positive quotes on sticky notes and hang them around your home or create a wallpaper for your phone with these affirmations and quotes. Simple acts like these can be more beneficial than you realize.
Journal prompt:
What kind of life do you want to create for yourself?