change perspective – Strength Scripted

What’s in your beauty products?

This blog post started as a comparison article on two brands of skin care cleanser and moisturizer (which I still may do). However, something else was weighing heavy on my chest… during my research, I realized that not every product (in what I thought was the cleaner skin care brand) was actually not free of harmful chemicals. There was still a chemical or two that got into the formula! You may think, “eh, just one harmful ingredient? Not a big deal.” What if I said that this one ingredient in the face cleanser “some studies indicate toxic effects on blood and liver. It is also suspected to have effects on hormones and fertility.” Let me repeat that, A FACE CLEANSER! The most mind blowing thing about this is why is a face cleanser affecting fertility and other organs in your body?!? How is an ingredient like this even allowed in the products we use on our skin?? And what other products do we have to worry about??

I know that many products nowadays are filled with toxins and so sometimes certain warnings on products don’t really concern you because “it’s just another one added to the list,” but please know that every effort you take to reduce and minimize the amount of toxins you are exposed to on a daily basis will make a difference. Don’t be okay with another toxic product being added to your list, take control of your life and be mindful of the products you and your family are using. There are safe products out there, you just gotta find them. (But don’t worry, that’s one of the reasons that I created this blog in the first place, to spread this awareness!)

When I started this clean beauty journey I was aware of harmful chemicals in beauty and wellness products, I just didn’t know what the chemicals were, what they actually caused, or what products they were in. That’s when I made the decision to search for healthier clean products for myself and my family. I took matters into my own hands and I stopped allowing advertisements and influencers to persuade me to buy certain things without first doing my research.

It started with hair care. Then moved on to skin care. By this time I’m fed up with the amount of carcinogens, endocrine disruptors, and other irritants in my hair and skin care products, but then my eyes OPENED. What other things in my home have these harmful chemicals?!?! The laundry detergent, dish soap, house cleaning supplies, body soap, and other cosmetics like lash extension glue, acrylic nails, hair dye, and most concerning: FOOD, the list goes on!!!! My goodness, how is this even allowed!? There are many ingredients in beauty products and food products that are banned in other countries but are being served to Americans on a daily basis. Why aren’t more people talking about this?! Why is nothing being done to make our beauty and food products safer? Our literal health is at risk, but our ‘leaders’ don’t care because they don’t pay for our health care. They make money off us buying these products and they make money from us getting sick. How do we win?! By taking control of what you consume and allow into your home!

If you want to completely swap out your beauty and food products for healthier cleaner options, the price can be much higher. I try my very best to find the best deal for certain products and other cleaner alternatives, but for the things I cannot replace I just remove them completely from my life.

For instance, I’ve swapped out my body lotion for organic unrefined coconut oil from the grocery store. However, I stopped my bc completely because I could not find something better for my body and the symptoms were undesirable. It did not feel right that I was stopping my body from doing what it naturally does (even if I wasn’t TTC, processes still happen that bc stops). I don’t recommend this for everyone but praying, monthly tracking, and condoms are alternative options. It’s important to keep in mind that not everyone’s alternatives will look the same or work the same.

Finally, whether you are new to this or are already working on living a cleaner, chemical free lifestyle, I’m glad you’re here. This journey won’t be easy, but community will make it better. I’ve created this blog to be that place where you will find safer products for yourself and share your thoughts and questions. I also write a lot about self-care and self-love because if you don’t incorporate either of those in your life, then you won’t have the motivation or drive to make the necessary changes in your life. It’s more than just swapping out products, you’re choosing your health and future!

Follow along for more content like this 🤍 StrengthScripted.com

xo, J

What is self care? The most used and abused word.

Let’s dig deeper into the meaning of Self-Care

We need to talk about the real meaning of “self-care” because it has turned into such an overused word that is beginning to change the true meaning of it. Sure many self-care practices involve bath bombs, skin care routines, yoga etc. but the more vital part of self-care is why you’re doing it, how it makes you feel and how it’s helping you improve yourself worth, self love and confidence. There’s more to self care than bath bombs.

Self-care is building an unbreakable bond between your mind, body and soul.
Janice Avilla @strengthscripted

I don’t make self-care a priority because it’s fun and trendy. I make my self-care a priority because it fills my cup up. It gives me energy to tackle the day. It lifts me back up after a long hard day. It makes me feel worthy of being loved by myself, not others. It makes me happy. I do it for ME. I do it for my son. Because when I take care of myself, I’m more happy and at ease and I can give my best to my son and the people around me.

Practicing self care regularly has allowed me to connect more deeply with myself. I am more in tune with my mind and body. I can read the signs my body is giving more clearly. I know when my period is coming, estimate when I’m ovulating, and recognize that certain pain in my body is my mind trying to distract me from something bigger. I can identify the emotions I’m feeling and help myself process those feelings accordingly. My anxiety has gotten better because I can organize my thoughts and determine whether they are rational or not. I have created my own inner happiness that is untouched by my environment. All because of my commitment to self-care

I have created my own inner happiness that is untouched by my environment. All because of my commitment to self-care.
Janice @StrengthScripted

Society and big brands trying to sell you their products slap the “self-care” word all over their marketing and hope people will fall for it. Influencers claim if you use their essential oils or bath bomb then you will feel so much happy and fulfilled because of this self care act. In reality, people need to look within and find what you actually need to feel fulfilled. Everyone’s self care needs are different and no one can tell you what YOU need to do for self care to fill YOUR cup up and improve YOUR self love. If you don’t like to take baths then what good are bath bombs gonna be? What works for some might not work that well for you.

My biggest advice for beginning your actual self-care journey is to journal. Write down anything that comes to mind, everything that makes you happy, things you love, things you want to do someday, your goals, dreams, desired lifestyle, etc. etc. Just write. You will get to know yourself in your journal and begin building your self-care routine that’s catered specifically to you. It’s much more special when you build your own routine. I would check out The Self Love Journal that I created to help you get started. It’s a workbook style PDF with journal prompts, self care planner etc to help guide you on your journey. [Check the shop tab on top or click the link above]. It’s what helped me so much on my own journey so I worked really hard to put a book together to share with others. When I began this journey I was alone and didn’t know others who were interested in anything self-care (explains all the burnout in the workplace), but you don’t have to feel that way because I am here for you! My mission here is to create a community for women who are all on their self-care/love journey that can share their experience and advice to others and help build each other up. If you’re interested in joining the group chat, please comment below or email me directly [check the contact tab] so I can add you. It’s a secure and private chat vetted personally by me!

Lastly, I hope that this post has resonated with you and has given you the motivation to make self-care a priority to you. If you’re still feeling a bit unsure, join the chat and start there or purchase the The Self Love journal to get started. But you don’t really need any of these, just yourself. You got this!!! One stepping stone at a time.

Now go be great!

Xo, J

I’m back on TikTok… Maybe! (Video)

Hiiiii! Hope you are doing fabulous and you’re weekend is full of relaxation, laughter and peace.

I wanted to share with you my latest video I created on TikTok! I’ve made a few videos in the past but this is my first one in a while! Should I keep making more like this? Try something different? Or should I just stay off TikTok?? I wanna hear what you think! I honestly really enjoyed creating these kinds of videos and would like to do more if you guys like them!

Check it out below!

If you wanna follow me on TikTok my handle is “StrengthScripted”!! Follow me and I’ll follow back 🤍

xo, J

Creating the life you desire. How do you bring more happiness, peace, and positivity to your life?

How do you find happiness in the midst of chaos? We know that happiness comes from inside… but it is so hard to not allow other people around you to affect your happiness. Especially if they are very negative people with bad energy or if they treat you poorly and make you feel awful about yourself. It’s hard to not believe something if someone is constantly repeating it to you.Your environment plays a big role in your happiness and mindset.

The way you speak to yourself is SO vital in combating any negativity that has entered your mind. Speak positively to yourself all the time! When you find yourself thinking ugly thoughts about yourself immediately distract that thought with something else. That is not really YOU talking so you have full permission to shut that voice up. It’s taking valuable head space away from you. So make sure you are “washing” those negative thoughts away with positive thoughts and change the narrative.

I heard this analogy before and I love it so if you’re a visual person like myself you may find it useful. Think of your brain like a cup of clear water. When dirty water (negative thoughts) gets inside it starts to cloud the clean cup of water. So in order to get that water clean again, you have to pour clean water (positive thoughts & self talk, inspiration etc) into the cup as many times as you need to to flush that dirty water out. Same with your brain. You watch a few upsetting videos on social media, now you feel a bit down. Ever notice that? Sometimes you can even feel it in your body! That’s when it’s your job to step in and fill your mind with other things that will make you feel happy, strong, ambitious, etc.

When you make a mistake, be more understanding!! Instead of calling yourself “stupid for not doing xyz” or “so selfish and careless for forgetting that thing.” Try spinning it around. Instead say, “it stinks I forgot xyz but no worries next time I will find a way to remind myself better.”

Just like when you are trying to change something about yourself, like I mentioned in previous blog posts, it’s a mindset game – you repeat it to yourself until you believe it for yourself. This goes for both positive and negative things. If you are constantly saying, “I’m broke”… guess who will most likely stay that way? Same goes for if someone is constantly telling you how “worthless” you are- even if you don’t want to admit it or maybe you don’t even realize, but that sits in your subconscious mind and it will manifest.

Talking down to yourself after a mistake doesn’t correct the mistake and it most likely won’t prevent another one. You have to forgive yourself! There might be a reason you’ve been so forgetful lately (lack of sleep, stress, etc.) or a reason why you have no energy to get all the things done (no self-care, burning out, overwhelm etc.). It’s important to pay attention to your body and the signs your body tries to give you.

Be more mindful next time you are on social media, chatting with a friend or relative that likes to gossip, etc and think about how you feel afterwards. Do you feel some joy? Energized in some way? Sad and unmotivated? Are the negative thoughts you had during that time still in your mind for a few hours after or maybe the rest of the day? Once you realize what you feed your mind has control over how you feel and your mood then YOU have the power.

You are in control of the company you keep. You are in control of the shows and videos you watch. You are in control of what music you listen to. All of these influences are outside, but are still in your control- so be very mindful of this. Create a life you desire, whether that’s full of positivity, surrounded by great people, etc. Take the actions to start manifesting it. If you want to be surrounded by kind people, put yourself in positions to meet these kinds of people. Join a book club, go golfing, go to museums, find a church that vibes with you etc. If you want more positivity in your life then cater to that. Tweak your social media timelines and accounts you follow to show things that bring you happiness, joy and laughter, write affirmations and positive quotes on sticky notes and hang them around your home or create a wallpaper for your phone with these affirmations and quotes. Simple acts like these can be more beneficial than you realize.

Journal prompt:

What kind of life do you want to create for yourself?

Personal reflections: Living, dealing and healing from a drug addicted and/or alcoholic parent.

I honestly don’t know where to start with this one because it’s still so fresh… My father is still currently battling alcoholism and has since I was a baby. I’ve begged him to stop drinking since I was a child. By the age of 16 I knew there was nothing I could do or say that would make my dad stop drinking and using drugs. I was a daddy’s girl and was very protective over my dad which caused me to enable him. I would say things like, “Yes dad, have a beer, but only one.” “Please don’t sniff that line dad, just have some beer instead.” But I also have to remember that regardless of if I gave him ‘permission’ to drink or not, he will find a way to do what he wants. There were times where he lived with me (as an adult), and I had rules to how drunk he could get because I have had enough of dealing with my drunk father growing up. I want to help him, but I also have to protect my mental health as well. Knowing damn well that having my alcoholic father live with me while he still abuses alcohol and drugs was never good for my mental health to begin with, but there was no way I would allow my dad to be homeless. He has been in and out of rehab and only lasted several months before he relapsed and went back to his old ways. Nothing was going to stop my dad until he wanted to or until he was forced. I want to mention that my dad is an army veteran with PTSD and other mental health issues like depression and anxiety, so he turns to alcohol to numb his pain and wash away his worries. He realizes that it’s only a temporary fix, so he decides to start drinking from the time he wakes up until he goes back to sleep. Like clockwork.

It took me a while to realize that I was enabling my dad, but I felt like out of all the crap people in my dad’s life that take advantage of him and never help him out, I felt like my dad needed someone like me in his life. This was how I felt. He knows he can always come to me because I have nothing but love for him. Yes he has hurt me a lot with his addictions, but I have forgiven him and his illness because he too has had a hard upbringing. We have to remember that our parents also had a childhood and a life before us. Unhealed, our childhood traumas follow us into adulthood. I try to picture people as a child to understand them better. Everyone needs someone with some empathy in them to understand just a glimpse of our lives and traumas. Sometimes an abuser just needs to know they aren’t alone, that they do have something to live for and that someone in this world does love them.

My dad has continued to try to get clean. He has significantly reduced his drug use over the years, but alcoholism has continued to haunt him. He has realized that his drinking is starting to affect his body and organs. Right now he is dealing with several medical issues associated with his drinking and unhealthy living habits. With the help, guidance and love of God and reading the bible, my dad has put in a real effort to change his life around. He doesn’t want to hit rock bottom again and lose everything like he did 12 years ago. He has worked too hard and I believe God still has a purpose for him here because of everything terrible he has gone through, he is still alive. Recently my dad has had a major surgery and is scheduled for another surgery in a month. He now has no choice but to stop drinking and abusing his vessel that God has blessed him with.

I’ve learned from dealing with my dad that either they will decide to stop drinking or it will be decided for them one way or another. We have to remember that we cannot force our parents or loved one to stop drinking and using drugs if they do not want to put the work in to actually quit and fight temptations. We also have to remember that it isn’t our fault they are like this and that this disease is not truly who they are. They are a different person under the influence. They are hurt and broken inside and are finding a way to numb it. Many won’t admit, some will acknowledge it. It’s important to protect your mental health and energy and remind yourself that they do love you under all of the rage of alcohol and/or drugs. I am still healing from the trauma around my dad’s alcoholism and drug addiction. All we can continue doing is pray to God that he will save them and guide them onto the right path to Him. Leave all of your burdens at God’s feet and watch Him work

I hope someone reading this that is dealing with something similar can take something away from this post. I don’t have it figured out and the only psychology background I have is some college classes. I just wanted to share my personal opinions and reflections I’ve made over many years of living with this. Thank you for reading 🤍